....

Ive kept this blog as a draft for so long, mainly because i keep changing it up and I'm always thinking if anyone still goes on blogger just to look back at how things used to be, and how much things have changed. I do.. Its kind of weird because i left this class on bad terms with a lot of people so if anyone is reading this, you're probably shocked that I'm even still on this site. So far I've only seen the 2 main people make blogs on here, maybe its because of the bond we all had. I pass through Ilima every single day, so of course memories always cross my mind, and all i could think about is how much i miss Leadership, and the memories i made in that class. Im not gonna lie, it was so stressful but Mr.Ing always reminds the class that Relationships are important in the class. Its true, i remember what kind of relationship i had with the small group i was always with in that class. Honestly loved how things were between us 4. I know i left on bad terms and it was the worst timing too, but i don't know what i was really feeling that month, the way i felt about the class and relationships i had in that class, i think it really affected me when the whole class had a problem with what kind of relationship i had with Mr.Ing, Korey and Laila. I really don't know how to explain what happened when i left, but  i really do wish it didn't have to end the way it did. Ever since i left that class, i always thought of finding a way to explain myself to everyone. I don't even know what I'm saying tbh, i don't even think anyone is gonna read this but its okay, i just needed to talk. Im not gonna lie, the last 2 weeks i was out of leadership was fun, i had a lot of freedom. But then i realized how much i NEEDED to be in that class, how much it kept me in check, kept me out of trouble, gave me responsibilities.. learning to be a LEADER. Even though i wasn't a leader for any of the periods, i felt like one, i had a lot of responsibilities in that class, and even though i complained a lot about doing things all the time, i started to miss it so much! I think i played more of a leader role than my own group leaders. Im not gonna talk about what made me leave, i just wanted to thank the person who molded me into becoming the way i am now. I mean, I'm not good.. i still need to improve a lot. But without leadership, if i didn't come back to leadership for my 8th grade year i don't think i wouldn't have got Honor Roll my 1st quarter of 8th grade year, i think i would've been in a lot of drama, i would've been in the office all the time, maybe my grades would've been worse. I apologize for leaving the way i did, but I'm so glad i was given another chance to be in that class. I learned to be more independent, and the lessons I've learned in that class is starting to help me now. The first time i started to feel important in the class was when i was in charge of ISA. Its kind of a small thing, but i looked at it as a big thing! Like cmon now, being in charge of an event is pretty cool, thats when i knew it was a good time to show Mr.Ing i really changed from how i was in my 7th grade year. I remember he made a blog about the changes he seen in our class, one of his paragraphs was about me. How he seen the whole 360 change in me, and I'm gonna assume that he dosent think that way anymore after the way i left, but I'm still here. I still feel like a leader, out of all my friends I'm the only one who can confidently say that i could control what we do in that group. I don't want it to sound bad, but i make the decisions, when things go wrong i end up fixing it, etc. When i get into problems, i do what i used to do in leadership. So many people in that class use to always go in circles trying to solve their problem. They spent more time talking/complaining about it rather than actually fixing it. Thats where some went wrong, you can't just talk it out and expect things to be ok later. When i got into a problem, i went straight to the person who was affected by it. I went straight to the person i knew that would help me not only solve it but learn from it. I STILL DONT KNOW WHAT IM SAYING, I'm literally just going off with whats on my mind. This blog use to be longer but i deleted a few parts. Ill just end this blog by saying, don't ever take advantage of this class. When Mr.Ing says you won't find a class like leadership.. he's right! And when he says that relationships in that class is important, he's right! Basically, he's right about almost everything lol its important to have a good one with everybody in that class, but when you gain trust and get into the inside of someones circle the relationship is so much better! You end looking forward to something, instead of just looking forward to doing a job with your group, its like you get to look forward to learning/having fun with friends! I can't explain it, I'm just happy with the memories i made with the small group of 4 i had in that class(: